Resignation and Resolve

"what is her fucking problem?"

Those words echo in my mind, swirling around in my skull like a leaf caught in an updraft. Does he think I can not see that pale version of me that follows him around, pretending to be some sort of replacement for her. Does he think I can not smell her offensive odor in the den? I know they are FAR too close already, my sister only gone a few days and he is already ready to take another. He had brought that ridiculous imposter into HER home while she struggled to feed and care for HIS offspring. All the while, he spews his meek little questions after her at me, as if -that- will convince me he is not a traitorous bastard. No wonder she left. I knew long ago how selfish he is, but it took a great deal of pain endured by my sister for her to figure it out too. I would not tell her, I could only support her as she figured it out herself.

The trip into the mountains to retrieve a body, proved unfortunately necessary. I had hoped the rantings of that idiot were proven false, but, after scouting the pass, taking on dangerous game, and putting up with infuriating company, there it was. Another of the Cloaks has fallen. It occurred to me as I claimed his belongings, after dragging his body down from the cliffs, that he did not seem to care for me much. It was a shame, I had truly hoped he might save us, unite us somehow, remind me..teach me, what a true leader is meant to be. But sadly, he has passed from this world, and now I must seek out the only person I have ever seen him show a true interest in, and tell her he is dead.

Bless him, my companion, my friend, my confidante. He is simply there, offering what he can, always given without expectation or demand. He beats me relentlessly with his frustrating, barbaric logic, and time and time again, successfully makes his point. He distracts me with his dreams and goals, pulling me out of the downward spiral of sorrow and anger, and keeps me balanced, gives me reason and hope. He is the only person left who would noticed if I passed, who would mourn the loss of me. I am thankful the Storm Father has brought him to me, for I think I would have lost my mind without him. He helped me survive the plague, helped me regain my lost memories, helped me retain my temper against those that invoke my fury, and gives me reason to do more than throw myself in the path of poison and pain.

Yes, thank you Storm Father.....once more, it takes me entirely too long to see the gifts you bring.